Memories
- This question brings back memories. I am 55 now and was in my mid to late 20s when I became symptomatic. Tests were so tiring I gave up for 2 years before diagnosis. Eventually RA sent me back for more tests or to start fresh. The phone call from my doctor left me with pictures in my mind of how I would become mal-formed (young). Then came disbelief, rebellion, and acceptance. Now, my body is not in the best of health but acceptance has made me mentally and emotionally healthy.
- —Baxter1
Denial!
- Denial! Denial! Denial! I was 15 and I couldn't and wouldn't accept it. I would rather cover it up, and my mom didn't help either. She wouldn't even say the name out loud. It took me over 3 years to come to terms with my RA and I still have my bad days here and there... My suggestion, take it easy. Don't fight your feelings, somehow it will fall into place.
- —karin.geitner
Total denial until...
- Like many others have shared, it took a long time to get a correct diagnosis so when I did I was in total disbelief. I stayed that way for over a year thinking that my doctors would realize they had made a terrible mistake and that I didn't have RA. I finally had to admit it to myself when my rheumy said I needed to get more aggressive with my treatment to stop the damage being done to my joints from years of un/misdiagnosed active disease and my surgeon informed me that I needed bilateral knee surgery. Thats when the seriousness of the disease and fears for the future began. I have since learned that I have to start paying attention to what my body is telling me and thanks to new meds I can have a new "normal" life filled with happiness, joy and hope. Yes, even hope. But it took a lot of soul searching and facing the truth to get to this point. Now I find out all I can about RA, new/alternative treatments and thanks to wonderful sites like about.com I am no longer in denial.
- —Cynvee
Waiting to meet Rheumy
- As I was diagnosed with CFS and Fibromyalgia and osteoporosis in the last 7 years, and osteo since I was 15 I had a hard job persuading doc I had something different that was causing my hands, feet, ankles and knees to swell and be extremely painful. I also get fevers. Eventually, after 4 months, he has referred me to the rheumy dept. Guess I feel relieved but a bit scared of taking more medication. I don't really know what to expect as everyone's experience differs. Got to remain positive for my daughter and four wonderful grandchildren.
- —NANNAPINK
Panic, Overdose, Collapse, Resiliency
- I was consumed with sudden onset joint pain at age 50, after living a relatively healthy life. The rheumatologist who saw me stated unequivocally after a brief clinical exam that I likely had Polymyalgia Rheumatica and that I could have Arterial Artritis. Based on the possibilities he prescribed a high dose injection of corticosteroids and a daily RX. He also claimed I could become totally and irreversibly blind if I did not do this. That last possibility panicked me. I followed this regimen for 9 mos when my family Doc recognized that I was suffering from tachycardia, and other side effects. He hospitalized me immediately. 5 different specialists came in to treat this condition and slowly decreased steroids. Despite the Drs' care, I had a complete physical collapse which left me unable to move & care for myself for 1 year+. Under a new rheumatologist I began a slow recovery which included a "cocktail of meds" + water therapy. 12 years out, I am coping, but quite limited walki
- —Guest Suzanne
Book
- I would suggest reading the book- Healing Pain by Ann Berger. It was a wonderful resource and helped me greatly.
- —Snoopy4500
Stunned
- I had been sick for 2 years before I found out it was RA. When I was diagnosed I was stunned. I thought I was too young to have it. It took a long time to get my meds right. Sometimes the side effects from the meds were worse than having RA. Later I was also told I had fibromyalgia. I was in a deep depression for a long time. I am now beginning to come out of it. I am presently seeing a therapist and taking antidepressants. It has been a long road for me and I hate having my family deal with me and RA.
- —Snoopy4500
Devastated
- I was just devastated...it was actually a relief finally getting the diagnosis because at least I now knew but then the the reality of it set in. I cried.
- —fallenangelic
Proper diagnosis
- I have still not got a proper diagnosis. just told its poly arthritis in many joints. It's symmetrical and I am so stiff in a morning for hours and after sitting for a while. It's starting to affect my life now not being able to do things. Catherine 46
- —Guest Catherine
Overwhelmed
- I am 48 and when I was first diagnosed with RA 18 months ago, I felt overwhelmed and scared. I have had fibromyalgia for 22 years and I was really expecting for that to still be the source of my pain. I've had so many new medical conditions since I turned 40, that I felt like "what now?" I immediately started educating myself about RA but I am still struggling a lot because the meds make me extremely ill and I don't know which is worse, the disease or the treatments. We're still trying to find the right combination of drugs and I'm still in a lot of pain. Most days I feel like I am up against a brick wall. This disease is brutal and it is frustrating because most people don't understand the severity of it. They think because you look ok, you must be ok.
- —bbw0827
Finally!
- I began to be really very sick in 1995 and by 1998 I was so sick that I was just thankful for the diagnosis. However, if I had known then what I know now I would have been devastated. Sometimes ignorance is bliss....
- —MicheleBB
I thought to myself - "How weird!"
- I was in my early 20s, and my honest reaction was, "Wow, how weird!" My aunt had died from RA complications at the age of 33 just 10 years prior to my diagnosis. I knew it could get bad, but I didn't believe that I would get bad. In any case, I knew it wouldn't do any good to sit around and fret over it. So I didn't. I modified the way I had to do certain tasks, I bought flat, unattractive shoes, and I never asked "why me." Life is too short to deal with "why me."
- —GoodNana
Sad and scared for the future
- i suppose looking back now i was luckier than most in a reasonable diagnosis within 6 months, but i was only 21 at the time and a remember sitting in the doc's room the same doctor i'd had all my life and nodding politely at everything he was telling " well now young lady it seems it's pretty conclusive you have some type of autoimmune arthritis." with that, i think i mumbled something like thank-you for your time and left i knew from from what i'd experienced in the last few months it wasn't going to be much fun and i think i cried all the way home. ah such is youth i had all these stupid thoughts like oh god my life is over and no one's gonna want to marry me.thank heaven for modern medicine.
- —keepondancing
Resigned but scared
- I knew once I started experiencing the pain and swelling in my hands and feet that it was most likely RA. My mother, sister and 1st cousin all have it and so once the symptoms started, I fought to get my diagnosis. However, once I received the diagnosis, I cried for 24 hours straight, hard uncontrollable sobbing. My mother had been undertreated for so long she has major damage. I was sure that my diagnosis meant the same future for me. Lucky for me, there have been so many new treatments out there and I found a rheumatologist who is not afraid to be aggressive in fighting this monster. My time since diagnosis has not been the dark, scary time I thought it would be. I feel very lucky that way.
- —PaulaM1960
Ah ha!
- Well I'd have to say ah ha! For years beginning in my late teens my hands always seemed to hurt and throb especially in the morning. Sometimes just trying to pick up pen to write -ouch. I always liked to do tedious things involving my fingers, I was a cosmetologist so my hands were important. My Grandmother always had awful arthritis - her hands were so swollen and "boggy' She used to get mad and say these old hands just don't want to work. She was an amazing sewer,very old school did everthing "perfectly" by hand and would try to teach me. She never went to rheumy, no need she said just getting old and pain was part of it.She would just take apirin, Ben Gay (ugh), heating pad. My Mom has very bad arthritis too all over as my GM did. Doctors just said arthritis and that ws that.When I found out I had RA it all made sense. I was diagnosed after I had gone through B/C treatment. I wasn't feeling well. My onc said I think you have something autoimmune. Now time for a plan of attack !
- —planetlucy
